I thought that Christians always lived on a mountaintop.
I thought that our lives of "glory to glory" meant literally that. I thought that there was a Scriptural promise to match with every personal doubt and that as long as we played the matching game right, we would be thrilled in the hope of Christ all our days. I thought that the tribesmen who heard the Gospel for the first time always responded with delight and threw themselves onto Christ. I thought that godly people who did the right thing would certainly make a difference in the world and stand unmovable in hail and lightening, even if they died. I thought that pain and sorrow were below us, that victory was before us, that triumph was in us.
And in a sense, what I thought was true. In another sense, I missed the point entirely. I failed to see the metanarrative of the Bible. I failed to see the end goal of the Gospel. I fell short of Who it's all about. I put myself, my feelings and what my eyes could see on a pedestal. And that stuff had to topple down.
You've probably been where I was: standing empty-handed, with a grave on one side, no answers on the other, a sunset behind, and not sure what's before. You've had your own version of ground-zero, that moment when you stopped and asked: "Is this what I signed up for?" You've been in bleak winter too. And that's the reason I'm writing these 4 thoughts on faith and suffering:
1) This is not abnormal.
I detached a lot of feeling from the facts of the Bible. I didn't think about Moses' fear as he stood on the mountain in the presence of a holy God, and the horror of coming down and seeing his people shout in worship to a gold calf made out of a bunch of jewelry. I didn't think about what it meant for Joseph to marry his fiance' who was already pregnant, or what it was like to risk your life in the gap for a whole nation marked down for slaughter. I didn't match the fact that Paul and Silas singing on the floor of the jail with the fact that they had just been horrifically beaten and were laying in their blood. I didn't understand Job's heart-cry that asked why God's people are rejected. I didn't mentally stand with the disciples at the foot of the Cross, or process that years of dedicated following had ended in an instant when their Master and Lord was killed (and they didn't know the end of the story). But when my feelings were suddenly shattered, I realized that the Bible was full of the same thing. I realized that it isn't abnormal for God's people to pass through waters, wander in deserts, be pursued by enemies, face lions, mourn nations, pick through rubble, have thorns in the side, bury their friends, or get called before a bloody Cesar. In Matthew 10:22, Jesus said, "You will be hated by all because of My name, but it is the one who has endured to the end who will be saved", and later, Paul says in Acts 18:22, "through many tribulations we must enter the kingdom of God". 1 Peter 4:12 says, "Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you." In Hebrews 13:13, the saints are told, "Let us go to Him outside the camp and bear the reproach he endured. For here we have not lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come."
Suffering is not abnormal. Not only is it to to be expected, but it is promised. And, in view of a lasting city, it's going to be okay. But we're not there yet...
2) Behold your God.
In tough times, Christians can err by misunderstanding and undermining pain (ignoring it's huge presence in the Bible and in the lives of believers), or they can err by confronting pain with a handful of "promise verses" that don't resonate when the heart is heavy. Singing a song into a heavy heart and tacking a comfort concept onto a bleeding wound fails to engage with God's purpose in trial, the soul that is going through it, or the Source of all comfort. This is why the Bible as a whole is our lifeblood and why the big picture is so important. You cannot believe that His grace is sufficient in suffering if you do not know something of the infinite grace that closed the chasm between sinful, rebellious humanity and the thrice Holy God. You cannot believe that His peace will surpass all understanding, unless you have glimpsed His defeat of Satan and the fact that He sits down, sovereign, at the right hand of the Father. You cannot grasp that joy comes in the morning unless you've been to Calvary and seen how the greatest tragedy in the world became the world's greatest triumph three days later. You cannot hope for anything unless you've turned to the last page of the Book and tasted, seen and believed that His promises are true. You cannot say "it is well" in trial, unless you know "it is well" for all eternity.
In John 11, after her brother died, a grieving Martha said to Jesus: "Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died." Jesus responded, "I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in Me, though he die, yet shall he live, and everyone who believes in Me shall never die. Do you believe this?" He confronts her sorrow with His character. He knows that for her to believe what He will do, she must know Who He is. Her response: "Yes, Lord, I believe you are the Christ, the Son of God, who was coming into the world." Yet, when Christ said "take away the stone", she objected, because her brother had been dead "four days". Listen to Jesus: "Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?"
Don't undermine pain and don't throw a few verses at it. Set yourself like flint to know the Savior, seek Him to find Him, and when you take hold of Him, do not let Him go. "My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts (Is. 55:8-9)." His purpose from creation was to glorify Himself and take home a people for His very own possession (Titus 1:11-14); if He is God, that purpose cannot be thwarted (Prov. 21:30, Job 42:2). There is a glorious end, and we will make it.
3) The commands are yours (not just the promises.)
We are commanded to repent and believe the Gospel. We are commanded to believe the Word of God. We are commanded to believe in Jesus. We are commanded to believe in the works of Jesus. And then we are commanded to do a lot of other things. Believing in Jesus doesn't let you off the hook and pain doesn't let you off the hook. Rather, true belief drives devotion into the teeth suffering, is okay to stay there, and trusts that it is worth it all.
For example, Shadrach, Mesach and Abednego were captured by the enemies of Israel, commanded to worship a huge gold image, and they chose death by fire instead. They obeyed the commandment to worship God only. Utterly sure of God's faithfulness and worthiness, they said, "We have no need to answer you [O king] in this matter...Our God, whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and He will deliver us our of your hand, O king. But if not, be it known to you, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up (Dan. 3:16-18)." These guys faced certain death in a situation that was less than ideal, but they obeyed and they put the result in God's hands. God came to them in the fire, and glorified Himself throughout the land of Babylon by their obedience.
Or, see Peter and John before the Council in John 4. They were told to quit speaking in the name of Jesus, and they responded, "Whether it is right in the sight of God to listen to you rather than God, you must judge, for we cannot but speak of what we have seen and heard (vs. 19-20)." The second time they were caught, they were beaten, yet, "they left the presence of the council, rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer dishonor for the Name. And every day, in the temple, and from house to house, they did not cease teaching and preaching that Christ is Jesus (5:41-42)."
Obedience like this stems from belief in who God is, and rock-solid certainty that His purpose to exalt Himself cannot be redirected or reduced. It stems from the knowledge that trials are not accidents, not meaningless, and will be used to glorify His Name. And it stems from knowing Him "who endured from sinners such hostility against Himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted (Heb. 12:1-3)." Christ did not complain upon the Cross, run from the Cross, or opt for Plan B. He came to do the Father's will, He drank the full cup of God's wrath in our stead, and He said "Follow Me". The "comfort concepts" in Psalm 23 take on a whole new meaning in a suffering soul, but it is richer, and worth it:
"The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want." (I will follow Him. I lack nothing if I have Him.)
"He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for His Name's sake." (He knows the right way. He knows what my soul needs. He is doing this for the glory of His Name. That can't be stopped.)
"Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever." (Goodness and mercy only exist with Him. There is an end worth all the tears.)
4) Glory to Glory.
I thought it was about me, but really it is about Christ in me. I thought it was about how I felt, but really it is about Who I believe in. I thought it was about my life, but really it is about the end of history, when multitudes gather from every tribe and tongue and language and nation to forever worship the Lamb.
"To Him who loves us and has freed from from our sins by His blood and made us a kingdom, priests to His God and Father, to Him be glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen (Rev. 1:5-6)."
"Let this be recorded for a generation to come, so that a people yet to be created may praise the Lord: that He looked down from His holy height; from heaven the Lord looked at the earth, to hear the groans of the prisoners, to set free those who were doomed to die, that they might declare in Zion the name of the Lord, and in Jerusalem His praise, when peoples gather together, and kingdoms, to worship the Lord (Ps. 102:18-22)."
"He shall wipe every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away...Behold, I am making all things new (Rev. 21:4-5)."
"Our soul waits for the Lord; He is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in Him, because we trust in His holy Name. Let Your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in You (Ps. 33:20-22)."
The conclusion is not that our questions get answered. The conclusion is that we are satisfied securely in God, His purpose and character (which allow us to believe His promise).
That's why we can go from glory to glory, for "though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day (2 Cor. 4:16)" in Him. That's why we can be filled with hope all the day, for He is the fulfillment of the Promise and no matching game will surpass that. That's why we can go to all the world with the Gospel, whether we see fruit or not, because God commands it and our glimpse of heaven confirms it. It's why, when godly people are killed and persecuted, they can be counted blessed, for we are "receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, and thus...offer to God acceptable worship, with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire (Heb. 12:28-29)." It's why pain and sorrow don't last forever, why victory is coming, and why we overcome.
"Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God, and everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of him. By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments. For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome. For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God? (1 John 5:1-5)"
I thought that our lives of "glory to glory" meant literally that. I thought that there was a Scriptural promise to match with every personal doubt and that as long as we played the matching game right, we would be thrilled in the hope of Christ all our days. I thought that the tribesmen who heard the Gospel for the first time always responded with delight and threw themselves onto Christ. I thought that godly people who did the right thing would certainly make a difference in the world and stand unmovable in hail and lightening, even if they died. I thought that pain and sorrow were below us, that victory was before us, that triumph was in us.
And in a sense, what I thought was true. In another sense, I missed the point entirely. I failed to see the metanarrative of the Bible. I failed to see the end goal of the Gospel. I fell short of Who it's all about. I put myself, my feelings and what my eyes could see on a pedestal. And that stuff had to topple down.
You've probably been where I was: standing empty-handed, with a grave on one side, no answers on the other, a sunset behind, and not sure what's before. You've had your own version of ground-zero, that moment when you stopped and asked: "Is this what I signed up for?" You've been in bleak winter too. And that's the reason I'm writing these 4 thoughts on faith and suffering:
1) This is not abnormal.
I detached a lot of feeling from the facts of the Bible. I didn't think about Moses' fear as he stood on the mountain in the presence of a holy God, and the horror of coming down and seeing his people shout in worship to a gold calf made out of a bunch of jewelry. I didn't think about what it meant for Joseph to marry his fiance' who was already pregnant, or what it was like to risk your life in the gap for a whole nation marked down for slaughter. I didn't match the fact that Paul and Silas singing on the floor of the jail with the fact that they had just been horrifically beaten and were laying in their blood. I didn't understand Job's heart-cry that asked why God's people are rejected. I didn't mentally stand with the disciples at the foot of the Cross, or process that years of dedicated following had ended in an instant when their Master and Lord was killed (and they didn't know the end of the story). But when my feelings were suddenly shattered, I realized that the Bible was full of the same thing. I realized that it isn't abnormal for God's people to pass through waters, wander in deserts, be pursued by enemies, face lions, mourn nations, pick through rubble, have thorns in the side, bury their friends, or get called before a bloody Cesar. In Matthew 10:22, Jesus said, "You will be hated by all because of My name, but it is the one who has endured to the end who will be saved", and later, Paul says in Acts 18:22, "through many tribulations we must enter the kingdom of God". 1 Peter 4:12 says, "Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you." In Hebrews 13:13, the saints are told, "Let us go to Him outside the camp and bear the reproach he endured. For here we have not lasting city, but we seek the city that is to come."
Suffering is not abnormal. Not only is it to to be expected, but it is promised. And, in view of a lasting city, it's going to be okay. But we're not there yet...
2) Behold your God.
In tough times, Christians can err by misunderstanding and undermining pain (ignoring it's huge presence in the Bible and in the lives of believers), or they can err by confronting pain with a handful of "promise verses" that don't resonate when the heart is heavy. Singing a song into a heavy heart and tacking a comfort concept onto a bleeding wound fails to engage with God's purpose in trial, the soul that is going through it, or the Source of all comfort. This is why the Bible as a whole is our lifeblood and why the big picture is so important. You cannot believe that His grace is sufficient in suffering if you do not know something of the infinite grace that closed the chasm between sinful, rebellious humanity and the thrice Holy God. You cannot believe that His peace will surpass all understanding, unless you have glimpsed His defeat of Satan and the fact that He sits down, sovereign, at the right hand of the Father. You cannot grasp that joy comes in the morning unless you've been to Calvary and seen how the greatest tragedy in the world became the world's greatest triumph three days later. You cannot hope for anything unless you've turned to the last page of the Book and tasted, seen and believed that His promises are true. You cannot say "it is well" in trial, unless you know "it is well" for all eternity.
In John 11, after her brother died, a grieving Martha said to Jesus: "Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died." Jesus responded, "I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in Me, though he die, yet shall he live, and everyone who believes in Me shall never die. Do you believe this?" He confronts her sorrow with His character. He knows that for her to believe what He will do, she must know Who He is. Her response: "Yes, Lord, I believe you are the Christ, the Son of God, who was coming into the world." Yet, when Christ said "take away the stone", she objected, because her brother had been dead "four days". Listen to Jesus: "Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?"
Don't undermine pain and don't throw a few verses at it. Set yourself like flint to know the Savior, seek Him to find Him, and when you take hold of Him, do not let Him go. "My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts (Is. 55:8-9)." His purpose from creation was to glorify Himself and take home a people for His very own possession (Titus 1:11-14); if He is God, that purpose cannot be thwarted (Prov. 21:30, Job 42:2). There is a glorious end, and we will make it.
3) The commands are yours (not just the promises.)
We are commanded to repent and believe the Gospel. We are commanded to believe the Word of God. We are commanded to believe in Jesus. We are commanded to believe in the works of Jesus. And then we are commanded to do a lot of other things. Believing in Jesus doesn't let you off the hook and pain doesn't let you off the hook. Rather, true belief drives devotion into the teeth suffering, is okay to stay there, and trusts that it is worth it all.
For example, Shadrach, Mesach and Abednego were captured by the enemies of Israel, commanded to worship a huge gold image, and they chose death by fire instead. They obeyed the commandment to worship God only. Utterly sure of God's faithfulness and worthiness, they said, "We have no need to answer you [O king] in this matter...Our God, whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and He will deliver us our of your hand, O king. But if not, be it known to you, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up (Dan. 3:16-18)." These guys faced certain death in a situation that was less than ideal, but they obeyed and they put the result in God's hands. God came to them in the fire, and glorified Himself throughout the land of Babylon by their obedience.
Or, see Peter and John before the Council in John 4. They were told to quit speaking in the name of Jesus, and they responded, "Whether it is right in the sight of God to listen to you rather than God, you must judge, for we cannot but speak of what we have seen and heard (vs. 19-20)." The second time they were caught, they were beaten, yet, "they left the presence of the council, rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer dishonor for the Name. And every day, in the temple, and from house to house, they did not cease teaching and preaching that Christ is Jesus (5:41-42)."
Obedience like this stems from belief in who God is, and rock-solid certainty that His purpose to exalt Himself cannot be redirected or reduced. It stems from the knowledge that trials are not accidents, not meaningless, and will be used to glorify His Name. And it stems from knowing Him "who endured from sinners such hostility against Himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted (Heb. 12:1-3)." Christ did not complain upon the Cross, run from the Cross, or opt for Plan B. He came to do the Father's will, He drank the full cup of God's wrath in our stead, and He said "Follow Me". The "comfort concepts" in Psalm 23 take on a whole new meaning in a suffering soul, but it is richer, and worth it:
"The Lord is my Shepherd; I shall not want." (I will follow Him. I lack nothing if I have Him.)
"He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for His Name's sake." (He knows the right way. He knows what my soul needs. He is doing this for the glory of His Name. That can't be stopped.)
"Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the Lord forever." (Goodness and mercy only exist with Him. There is an end worth all the tears.)
4) Glory to Glory.
I thought it was about me, but really it is about Christ in me. I thought it was about how I felt, but really it is about Who I believe in. I thought it was about my life, but really it is about the end of history, when multitudes gather from every tribe and tongue and language and nation to forever worship the Lamb.
"To Him who loves us and has freed from from our sins by His blood and made us a kingdom, priests to His God and Father, to Him be glory and dominion forever and ever. Amen (Rev. 1:5-6)."
"Let this be recorded for a generation to come, so that a people yet to be created may praise the Lord: that He looked down from His holy height; from heaven the Lord looked at the earth, to hear the groans of the prisoners, to set free those who were doomed to die, that they might declare in Zion the name of the Lord, and in Jerusalem His praise, when peoples gather together, and kingdoms, to worship the Lord (Ps. 102:18-22)."
"He shall wipe every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away...Behold, I am making all things new (Rev. 21:4-5)."
"Our soul waits for the Lord; He is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in Him, because we trust in His holy Name. Let Your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in You (Ps. 33:20-22)."
That's why we can go from glory to glory, for "though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day (2 Cor. 4:16)" in Him. That's why we can be filled with hope all the day, for He is the fulfillment of the Promise and no matching game will surpass that. That's why we can go to all the world with the Gospel, whether we see fruit or not, because God commands it and our glimpse of heaven confirms it. It's why, when godly people are killed and persecuted, they can be counted blessed, for we are "receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, and thus...offer to God acceptable worship, with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire (Heb. 12:28-29)." It's why pain and sorrow don't last forever, why victory is coming, and why we overcome.
"Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God, and everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of him. By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments. For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome. For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God? (1 John 5:1-5)"
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